• 8th May
    2013
  • 08
So I am calling this “Goodbye Russell: The End No. 1” Like all true volatile relationships, there is always more than one final goodbye.  It seemed like shortly after my return from our very happy, very lovely NYC NYE time together, things started feeling weird and off.  Hindsight is always 20/20, because I really should have seen this coming. April 2010: I remember a very specific conversation that took place at my friend’s bachlorette party.  It was a late night call.  A slightly drunk call, but I figured it was ok…expected even.  He seemed a little distracted and quiet.  For Russell to be quiet should have sounded some alarms, but I thought maybe he…well I don’t really know what I thought.  I do remember thinking it was weird.  He abruptly asked if he could call me back and never did.  A few days later he admitted to me that he had acquired a girlfriend.  What the what???  I did not handle it very well at all.  On top of hearing the worst possible news at that point in my life, Russell didn’t even tell me over the phone.  This all took place on Gchat.  And I allowed it to happen!  Ugh!  What a fucking coward. Your heart remembers where all of it’s breaks are and it still makes me mad and upset to think about the method in which he decides to tell me he’s moved on.  Apparently, I did not even warrant a phone call.

So I am calling this “Goodbye Russell: The End No. 1”

Like all true volatile relationships, there is always more than one final goodbye.  It seemed like shortly after my return from our very happy, very lovely NYC NYE time together, things started feeling weird and off.  Hindsight is always 20/20, because I really should have seen this coming.

April 2010:

I remember a very specific conversation that took place at my friend’s bachlorette party.  It was a late night call.  A slightly drunk call, but I figured it was ok…expected even.  He seemed a little distracted and quiet.  For Russell to be quiet should have sounded some alarms, but I thought maybe he…well I don’t really know what I thought.  I do remember thinking it was weird.  He abruptly asked if he could call me back and never did.  A few days later he admitted to me that he had acquired a girlfriend.  What the what???  I did not handle it very well at all.  On top of hearing the worst possible news at that point in my life, Russell didn’t even tell me over the phone.  This all took place on Gchat.  And I allowed it to happen!  Ugh!  What a fucking coward.

Your heart remembers where all of it’s breaks are and it still makes me mad and upset to think about the method in which he decides to tell me he’s moved on.  Apparently, I did not even warrant a phone call.

  • 8th May
    2013
  • 08
And this right here is Bobby Shaw.  No need to hide this man’s identity.  I created a blog just for him (and his friend, Andrew, the Princess).  He the most excellent storyteller.  I am not quite sure if you can believe all of his stories, but they are very entertaining.  He’s a good ol’ southern boy from Lubbock, Texas.   He’s a career bartender with a musical background.  He used to play on the patio of the restaurant we both worked at during the spring months.  You know, I hated working in the service industry which was no secret.  I was always scheduled the Monday morning lunch shift, which if you hate the service industry, is quite possibly the worst shift ever to work.  HOWEVER!  I worked Monday lunches with this man.  He was literally my bright and shining silver lining to working that horrible day. He was also in a band called Sweetleaf.  I have their album. He also wrote a book about the less than 24 hours the Beatles spent in Dallas, Texas.  He says it’s fully written and needs to be edited and have some images added to it. Here are some of his gems: “Feels good to have another woman crawling around the bed that’s not my dog, Willow.” “I’m crazy, but I’m a normal crazy.” Bobby Shaw: I need to find someone. Patrick: Why’s that Bobby Shaw? Bobby Shaw: I need to make sure my stuff works. “I know me…I’ll leak.”

And this right here is Bobby Shaw.  No need to hide this man’s identity.  I created a blog just for him (and his friend, Andrew, the Princess).  He the most excellent storyteller.  I am not quite sure if you can believe all of his stories, but they are very entertaining.  He’s a good ol’ southern boy from Lubbock, Texas.  

He’s a career bartender with a musical background.  He used to play on the patio of the restaurant we both worked at during the spring months.  You know, I hated working in the service industry which was no secret.  I was always scheduled the Monday morning lunch shift, which if you hate the service industry, is quite possibly the worst shift ever to work.  HOWEVER!  I worked Monday lunches with this man.  He was literally my bright and shining silver lining to working that horrible day.

He was also in a band called Sweetleaf.  I have their album.

He also wrote a book about the less than 24 hours the Beatles spent in Dallas, Texas.  He says it’s fully written and needs to be edited and have some images added to it.

Here are some of his gems:

“Feels good to have another woman crawling around the bed that’s not my dog, Willow.”

“I’m crazy, but I’m a normal crazy.”

  • Bobby Shaw: I need to find someone.
  • Patrick: Why’s that Bobby Shaw?
  • Bobby Shaw: I need to make sure my stuff works.


“I know me…I’ll leak.”

  • 6th February
    2013
  • 06
HI!  It is so good to be back and I can’t imagine a greater return in the new year with anyone else but this man!  I think I can call him a man.  I’ll just introduce him as The Princess.   I used to work this awful restaurant job, but it was offset by this gentleman.  I firmly believe that he is way above and beyond average intelligence.  So far beyond, in fact, that when you first meet him you might think he’s retarded.  He is the type of guy that you wish you could climb inside his head and see what exactly goes on in there.  He should donate his brain to science when he dies. He’s told more than a few stories about willing getting into the trunks of cars in order to avoid entrance fees into venues and events.  These stories would always have a line something to the effect of that he would hope and wish that he would be let out of the trunk.   He’s a compulsive gambler and has a super-di-duper soft spot of all living creatures.  He liked to feed the turtles and ducks that were in the pond inside the mall and he would always visit the catfish at this pond near his apartment.  He would feed them all dog good.   He was so funny and quick-witted that he inspired me to start another blog (The Adventures of Bobby S___ and A_____, The Princess).   Here are some select gems: “My boys are ready!  Are your ovaries?” Me: “Andrew, we don’t believe anything that comes out of your mouth!”  Andrew: “What if it came out of my ass?” “Men are simple. All we need is a horse track within 20 miles, a cannabis plantation, and Billy in exile.” Ps. Bobby S___ will be in the next post to follow.

HI!  It is so good to be back and I can’t imagine a greater return in the new year with anyone else but this man!  I think I can call him a man.  I’ll just introduce him as The Princess.  

I used to work this awful restaurant job, but it was offset by this gentleman.  I firmly believe that he is way above and beyond average intelligence.  So far beyond, in fact, that when you first meet him you might think he’s retarded.  He is the type of guy that you wish you could climb inside his head and see what exactly goes on in there.  He should donate his brain to science when he dies.

He’s told more than a few stories about willing getting into the trunks of cars in order to avoid entrance fees into venues and events.  These stories would always have a line something to the effect of that he would hope and wish that he would be let out of the trunk.  

He’s a compulsive gambler and has a super-di-duper soft spot of all living creatures.  He liked to feed the turtles and ducks that were in the pond inside the mall and he would always visit the catfish at this pond near his apartment.  He would feed them all dog good.  

He was so funny and quick-witted that he inspired me to start another blog (The Adventures of Bobby S___ and A_____, The Princess).  

Here are some select gems:

“My boys are ready!  Are your ovaries?”

Me: “Andrew, we don’t believe anything that comes out of your mouth!”  Andrew: “What if it came out of my ass?”

“Men are simple. All we need is a horse track within 20 miles, a cannabis plantation, and Billy in exile.”


Ps. Bobby S___ will be in the next post to follow.

  • 22nd October
    2012
  • 22
So after I’d moved back completely to Dallas I began to reconnect with old friends who introduced me to new friends.   Russell and I were still talking at this time.  We were actually talking everyday and communicating multiple times a day via text, gchat, etc.   Anyway, this was a new friend who I met through an old friend.  His name is Charles.  There were rumors that he had a crush on me but I couldn’t really tell.  He was cute, not really my type but a good guy nonetheless.  Nothing ever happened between us so I can’t really confirm the crush or not.  

So after I’d moved back completely to Dallas I began to reconnect with old friends who introduced me to new friends.  

Russell and I were still talking at this time.  We were actually talking everyday and communicating multiple times a day via text, gchat, etc.  

Anyway, this was a new friend who I met through an old friend.  His name is Charles.  There were rumors that he had a crush on me but I couldn’t really tell.  He was cute, not really my type but a good guy nonetheless.  Nothing ever happened between us so I can’t really confirm the crush or not.  

  • 4th October
    2012
  • 04

PROOF that Russell truly did not mind that I was putting his recordings out there in the interwebs-universe. What a joke and an ass!

  • Russell: the link in your tweet doesn't work
  • me: i know i deleted it
  • Russell: what was it?
  • me: none of your business
  • Russell: damn! reowr (pissed-off cat noise)
  • me: haha
  • you know what it was or else you wouldn't have asked...
  • Russell: i saw the title and was like, "she DIDN'T." but then i was like "adam, stop being so goddamn full of yourself. she might be talking about donovan"
  • me: who's donovan???
  • Russell: but you see, that would have been fine because you did it and didn't say who i was, so if somebody thought it was good, i could have been like "seriously, i'm totally the shit"
  • 18th September
    2012
  • 18

This was the final happy moment between me and Russell.  This was New Year’s Eve.  It was my last trip to New York for the foreseeable future and I was completely excited.  I was staying with Russell in Brooklyn.  We had such a good time.  We exchanged gifts in which I gave him a very thought-filled multi-present present and I got a “first come first serve” iPhone cover.  Beyond that, our New Years Eve plan was pretty good.  We just went to a pretty lame bar but I was with my best friend and it was open bar and free food.  Russell and I got pretty wasted.  It was a good time.  

I can’t actually quite remember, but I think he may have started to distance himself from me.  Instead of being a man, he chose the cowardly route.  Like I said, he started distancing himself from me, claiming he was always working, not calling me every night like he used to, and just acting weird.  I should have seen it coming but I chose to remain blissfully unaware that anything had changed between us which also made me a glutton for punishment.  More on that to come…

(*a post explaining the goof heads is coming soon)

  • 18th September
    2012
  • 18
My friends and I have discussed it: if we could have a boyfriend/husband like this guy the world according to women would be a much better place.  This is David.  He is the now-husband to one of my good girlfriends.  I actually met the pair together.  They were always a good time.  Sunday Funday was their day and everyone was welcome along for the ride.  Not too bad for a Canadian, either!  ;) 

My friends and I have discussed it: if we could have a boyfriend/husband like this guy the world according to women would be a much better place.  This is David.  He is the now-husband to one of my good girlfriends.  I actually met the pair together.  They were always a good time.  Sunday Funday was their day and everyone was welcome along for the ride.  Not too bad for a Canadian, either!  ;) 

  • 8th August
    2012
  • 08

I made several trips back to New York because partly because of Russell but mostly because I missed New York.  So these pictures were taken during my New Years Eve trip.  For this trip I decided to spend a good amount of time there.  I wanted to make sure that Russell and I had plenty of time together. 

However, I could not take a trip to NYC without seeing these two great men You may recognize one: Carson.  The other one is his best friend and we’ll call him The Doctor.  He is actually a doctor but I’m trying to keep these dude’s names anonymous.  These two had know each other since college and they are just the most fun people to hang out with.  Carson truly has become one of my greatest friends…love him!

#mce_temp_url#

  • 11th July
    2012
  • 11

So here are some long time friends that I’ve known since grade school.  I don’t know if the guy on the left looks familiar but that is Gregorio!  The other guy is Tony.  We were all sort of friends in middle school, but I remember that being at time when you weren’t supposed to like boys and boys weren’t supposed to like you.  Tony and I did go to high-school together kind of.  Gregorio went to another exclusive high-school but we all remained friends.  It is nice to reconnect sometimes!

  • 15th June
    2012
  • 15
This was my excellent first roommate, Todd.  We lived together in Astoria.  It was my first apartment in New York.  We shared the same hate for our third roommate who was a total whore and all around douche bag.  He was a very well educated, soft spoken guy and every sweet.  Todd and I didn’t hang out much.  We kept to ourselves, but every once in a while we would have coffee together or go explore Astoria.  While I had known Todd for a couple of years this was our first picture together at my going away party in 2009. 

This was my excellent first roommate, Todd.  We lived together in Astoria.  It was my first apartment in New York.  We shared the same hate for our third roommate who was a total whore and all around douche bag.  He was a very well educated, soft spoken guy and every sweet.  Todd and I didn’t hang out much.  We kept to ourselves, but every once in a while we would have coffee together or go explore Astoria.  While I had known Todd for a couple of years this was our first picture together at my going away party in 2009. 

  • 14th June
    2012
  • 14
  • 12th June
    2012
  • 12

Boys Suck Boys Rule Under Attack Again

So, at approximately 11am yesterday, June 7th 2012, Russell sent me an email.  It was a request to remove the 3 songs I had posted from his Narcissist’s Greatest Hits Album.  By 5pm, he reported me to Tumblr for violating copyrights (but only in proxy to the copyrights he is in violation of; explanation coming soon).  The songs that he says he made for me were taken down. 

I just have to say it right now, Russell and I did not have an amicable split.  He broke my heart.  I did not handle it well at all.  I’ll admit that I did somethings that I am not proud of.  He avoided me for quite some time.  After breaking up with his girlfriend that came after me, he gave the mixed signals that he wanted to be friends.  Then I did something that according to him was breaking a moral code and he asked that we not speak anymore.  Done.  Did that.  I didn’t think however that meant that I couldn’t express my thoughts and feelings and showcase the things he did for/to me here on my own blog. 

I was irked by his initial email and was taking my time to think about how I was going to proceed.  For him that was not fast enough.  He took matters into his own hands and had those particular posts removed.  Fine by me.  Not a big deal.  Interesting though that he doesn’t seem to mind the posts that include his pictures with the accompanying commentary.

This is the not the first time my blog has been attacked.  It was to be expected though.  I am revisiting old histories and some people are bound not to like it.  I don’t think I am being explicitly slanderous about anyone I’ve mentioned on here, but that is just my opinion.  It’s like all of those weekly tabloids or like that douche bag, Tucker Max and his book. 

I have to say it does fuel my fire to continue writing this blog.  I was speaking with my friend about this and she asked me how many people read my blog.  I told her that I wasn’t quite sure.  A few, I guess.  She asked how many people that Russell and I know mutually read my blog.  Zero.  I am 99.9% confident that a total number of zero people that we both know read this blog.  She made the suggestion that maybe he is sending those songs to other girls.  It wouldn’t surprise me.  He was absolutely terrible at giving really thoughtful gifts.  None of his gifts (all 2 of them) were thoughtful. 

During my conversation with my friend, I suggested that he might be in fear of getting caught for the copyright violations he committed by recording and distributing those songs.  Yep, I looked it up.  Without a license to do, it is a copyright violation to record and distribute any songs that a musician covers.  He doesn’t even have to gain any monetary compensation to be in violation.  He violated at least 10 copyrights.  It furthered proved my theory that those songs were never for me, but for his own ego and in the end to possibly protect his own ass from any legal recourse, which to be honest would never happen.  He’s just some narcissistic lonely little man living in Brooklyn making a modest wage as a stats guy for baseball who recorded 12 songs in his bathroom because I told him he had a sexy morning voice.  None of these artists would go after him even if he sent these recordings to thousands of girls.

One thing that makes me wonder is why he still checks in on me?  Why does he still read my blog every once in a while?  And why does he care?  I think he’s bored.  He might not have a girl in his life right now that can fully occupy his time.  Instead he is continuing to re-enter my life with this situation.  Now he’s just got a toe in the door, not like he’s made some grand gesture of asshole-iness that’s made a Russell-shaped cutout in the door of my life he just ran through.  Just a little poke.  It was his idea, request, suggestion that we not communicate anymore and to pretend as if we’d never met.  I’ve kept my side of the bargain.  I, in turn, had made a kind suggestion that he stop reading my blog.  Then that way he won’t have to deal with any “bad decisions and judgements” that he thinks I’ve made.  I’ve also thought that maybe subconsciously I’ve wanted to gain attention from him, but if that were the case I’d have to hold that true for every guy I’ve blogged about on here.  Maybe to some extent that is true, but certainly was not the intention when I started this blog.  The original intent of this blog was for catharsis, for readers to find it funny, sweet, endearing, and relate-able. 

All of what has gone on between me and Russell leaves me feeling really sad.  It is sad how we’ve ended up really not liking each other as people.  He thinks I am this girl without a moral compass who has been continually going after him for what he thinks is no apparent reason.  Hence the lack of morals on my part according to him.  He doesn’t like me because he thinks I don’t understand the value of the privacy of others and that I don’t respect his wishes that he’s “made in earnest” to me.  I don’t like him because he is thoughtless, he doesn’t have any consideration for other people’s feelings, and he doesn’t use any discretion.  He thinks that what he says is just and warranted for both parties involved.  “It will do us both good” is his logic.

I used to be over the moon in love with this guy and now I can honestly say that I truly do not like him.  I think this will be the final end for us, until he finds a reason to cast me as the bad guy again.  I will continue to go on and abide by his request that we not talk, tweet, facebook, call, text, chat to each other and I certainly do not read his blogs or anything.  I hope he can do the same.

Heads up: there will be a follow up to this- “How To Spot A Narcissist” but for now I will be back on track.  Next up: old friends/flames from middle school pop back up in my life that I don’t mind.

  • 11th May
    2012
  • 11

I had left New York City and moved back home in such a rush in order to spend what would be the last few weeks with my father.  Russell and I had practically developed a relationship long distance.  We both told each other that our relationship while totally romantic was put in between a rock and a hard place.  Neither one of could completely define it.  

Like I said before Russell made himself very available to me.  We talked every day and every night.  Constant texting and emailing.  Looking back it was a little bit out of the control.  

Since I had left so quickly I still had most of my things in NYC.  I had to plan a trip back to actually pack everything up and ship everything back home.  Earlier in the year I had gotten laid off from work and I thought it would be best if I just moved back home.  My mom was also sick and would need some help.  

These lovely pictures were taken during that trip back.  Russell and I now had the chance to be an actually couple even though it was only for a little while.  This was at my little going away dinner that I had with a few close friends.  It was actually one of the best nights.  Russell was his usual sloppily dressed, charming, hilarious self.  Due to another piece of “hate mail” I have had to cover up his face.  Even though you can’t see the 2nd picture of of him licking my kiss (is that an album title? if not it should be!) which was totally not planned.  That was all him being funny and gross.  It was a super weird feeling but it makes for one of the most interesting pictures of me with a former flame.  

  • 17th April
    2012
  • 17
Here is a super cute picture of me and Fletcher.  Here you can tell we are friends.  I was able to realize that he wasn’t “the one” but that we would be great friends.  We are still great friends today!

Here is a super cute picture of me and Fletcher.  Here you can tell we are friends.  I was able to realize that he wasn’t “the one” but that we would be great friends.  We are still great friends today!

  • 17th April
    2012
  • 17
These are a couple of dudes that my friend used to work with.  I was hanging out with them for a bit.  The one on the far left had it bad for my friend but for whatever reason she did not reciprocate.  Well, not to my knowledge anyway.  The guy on the far right was hilarious.  He would make me laugh endlessly anytime I saw him.  Both great guys. Oh, and yeah….I did get a little somethin’, somethin’ from homeboy on the left.  Just a little somethin’ mind you!

These are a couple of dudes that my friend used to work with.  I was hanging out with them for a bit.  The one on the far left had it bad for my friend but for whatever reason she did not reciprocate.  Well, not to my knowledge anyway.  The guy on the far right was hilarious.  He would make me laugh endlessly anytime I saw him.  Both great guys.

Oh, and yeah….I did get a little somethin’, somethin’ from homeboy on the left.  Just a little somethin’ mind you!